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Below are the 12 most recent journal entries recorded in beautifulxcrash's LiveJournal:

    Sunday, February 25th, 2007
    8:22 pm
    el captain
       

    i'm so happy :] i made captain for my
    lacorsse team. the best part? the whole team
    is made up of guys only. i'm the only girl haha XD

    power to me ♥

    so yeah, about the whole best friend
    who likes me? still unsure what will happen
    but i guess i shall let
    it play out on its own, you know,
    let fate take over.

    [ loren ]

    Current Mood: yay me!
    Current Music: glamorous - fergie
    Saturday, February 24th, 2007
    11:29 pm
    awkward situation
     

    okay, so i think i might be falling in love
    all over again...yay. i think. i don't know.

    i'm so freakin confused!!!

    tonight i went to a dance with my best
    friend ever, and we slow danced
    and he kinda of admitted that he likes me
    and yeah...

    wow. to the max.

    i have no idea what to do!!! 
    *hides in the corner of the room*

    yeah sorry i haven't updated in some time.
    my cpu has been screwing up big time.

    [ loren ]

    Current Mood: what do i do!?
    Current Music: you and me - lifehouse
    Saturday, February 3rd, 2007
    10:06 pm
    surrendering
     

    i give up. love apparently hates me or something. 
    ( that's almost an oxymoron! )
    i feel like complete and other sheet crap. 

    why is it that no one wants to pour their heart and
    soul into a relationship anymore? why is it that those
    who have a high status never get called on when they 
    make mistakes, but those with a lower status do, like me?
    it makes no freakin' sense.

    i'm tired of trying to make sense out of something that can't 
    be sensible. 

    doesn't anyone love me?

    [ loren ]

    Current Mood: i feel...unwanted
    Current Music: sugar, we're goin' down - fall out boy
    Sunday, January 28th, 2007
    12:51 pm
    GOAL



    okay, so i want to write a fic for every pairing out there
    & i finally wrote up the list last night.
    time to start!!!

    PAIRINGS

     

    sora x kairi
    sora x riku
    sora x selphie
    sora x tidus
    sora x roxas
    sora x olette
    sora x hayner
    sora x pence
    sora x seifer
    sora x axel
    sora x namine

    sora x squall

    sora x aerith

    sora x cloud

    sora x cloud

    sora x cid

    roxas x kairi
    roxas x riku
    roxas x selphie
    roxas x tidus
    roxas x olette
    roxas x hayner
    roxas x pence
    roxas x seifer

    roxas x axel

    roxas x namine

    roxas x squall

    roxas x cloud

    roxas x aerith

    roxas x yuffie

    roxas x cid

    riku x kairi

    riku x selphie

    riku x tidus

    riku x olette

    riku x hayner

    riku x seifer

    riku x namine

    riku x axel

    riku x squall

    riku x cloud

    riku x aerith

    riku x yuffie

    riku x cid

    kairi x tidus

    kairi x selphie

    kairi x hayner

    kairi x pence

    kairi x seifer

    kairi x olette

    kairi x namine

    kairi x axel

    kairi x cloud

    kairi x squall

    kairi x yuffie

    kairi x cid

    kairi x demnyx

    namine x selphie

    namine x tidus

    namine x seifer

    namine x pence

    namine x hayner

    namine x olette

    namine x axel

    namine x larxene

    namine x zexion

    namine x marluxia

    namine x demnyx

    namine x squall

    namine x cloud

    namine x aerith

    namine x yuffie

    namine x cid

    olette x selphie

    olette x tidus

    olette x hayner

    olette x pence

    olette x seifer

    olette x axel

    olette x demnyx

    olette x squall

    olette x yuffie

    olette x aerith

    olette x cloud

    olette x cid

    yuffie x selphie

    yuffie x tidus

    yuffie x hayner

    yuffie x seifer

    yuffie x squall

    yuffie x cloud

    yuffie x aerith

    yuffie x cid

    yuffie x axel

    yuffie x tifa

    yuffie x demnyx

    selphie x tidus

    selphie x hayner

    selphie x seifer

    selphie x axel

    selphie x squall

    selphie x aerith

    selphie x cid

    selphie x cloud

    selphie x demnyx

    axel x marluxia

    axel x demnyx

    axel x larxene

    axel x hayner

    axel x aerith

    axel x squall

    axel x cloud

    axel x cid

    axel x seifer

    axel x tidus

    axel x tifa

    squall x cloud

    squall x aerith

    squall x cid

    squall x hayner

    squall x seifer

    squall x tifa

    cloud x aerith

    cloud x tifa

    cloud x cid

    aerith x tifa

    aerith x marluxia

    repeats? anything i left out? let me know please.

    [ loren ]



    Current Mood: ready set write!
    Current Music: jenny was a friend of mine - the killers
    Saturday, January 27th, 2007
    3:53 pm


    25 Random iPod Songs for Fics
    (borrowed from zanisha)

     

    001. xo – fall out boy

     

    to the love I left my conscience pressed

    through the keyhole I watched you dress

    kiss and tell

    (loose lips sink ships)

     

    kaixel for sure <3

     

    002. listen to your heart – dance house trance

     

    sometimes you wonder if this fight is worth while

    the precious moments are all lost in the tide…yeah

    they’re swept away and nothing is what it seems

    the feeling of belonging to your dreams (to your dreams)

     

    kaiora. you know it ;-)

     

    003. wind it up – gwen stefani

     

    uh huh, it’s your moment

    uh huh, come on girl, you know you own it

     

    this is a kairi centric for sure.

     

    004. heaven – dj sammy

     

    oh, once in your life you find someone

    who will turn your world around

    pick you up when you’re feeling down

    now nothing could change what you mean to me

    there’s a lot that I could say

    but just hold me now

    cause our love will light the way

     

    hmm… I like this being a roxette. <3

     

    005. collide – howie day

     

    but I’m open, you’re closed

    where I follow, you’ll go

    I worry I won’t see your face

    Light up again

     

    I’m quiet, you know

    You make a first impression

    I’ve found I’m scared to know

    I’m always on your mind.

     

    Awwww. This would make a killer kaiora.
    maybe even a nice namiku.

     

    006. sooner or later – breaking benjamin

     

    I want a normal life,

    Just like a new born child

    I am a lover/hater

    I am an instigator

    You are an oversight

    Don’t try to compromise

    I’ll learn to love to hate it

    I am not integrated

     

    I like this as a soriku. Yeah :-)

     

    007. untitled – simple plan

     

    everybody’s screaming

    I try to make a sound but no one hears me

    I’m slipping off the edge

    I’m hanging by a thread

    I wanna start this over

     

    Oh, angst roxas centric.

     

    008. how long – hinder

     

    I can’t seem to get my heart over you

    Cause you creep into everything I do

    And now I’m dying to know

    How he touches you

     

    Dramatic onesided roxette/Haynette deal.

     

    009. the diary of jane – breaking benjamin

     

    there’s a fine line between love and hate

    and I don’t mind

    just let me say that I like that

    I like that

     

    Maybe a good lemony akuroku.

     

    010. my own worst enemy – lit

     

    can we forget about the things

    I said when I was drunk?

    I didn’t mean to call you that.

     

    possible haynette.

     

    011. stab my back – all american rejects

     

    stab my back, it’s better when I bleed for you.

     

    onesided akuroku, roxette.

     

    012. cool – gwen stefani

     

    and after all the obstacles

    it’s good to see you now with someone else

    and it’s such a miracle that you and me are still good friends

    after all that we’ve been through

    I know we’re cool

     

    namixas with roxette. (roxas is with namine)

     

    013. steady as she goes – the raconteurs

     

    find yourself a girl and settle down

    live a simple life in a quiet town

     

    either a hayner or riku centric.

     

    014. beverly hills – weezer

     

    the truth is: I don’t stand a chance

    it’s something that you’re born into

    and I just don’t belong

     

    roxas centric!!!

     

    015. get busy living or get busy dying – fall out boy

     

    I’m falling apart to songs about hips and hearts

    (you’re secret’s out)

     

    onesided kairiku <33

     

    016. too bad – nickelback

     

    guess it turned out in the end

    just look at where we are

     

    definitely kaiora.

     

    017. behind those eyes – 3 doors down

     

    you say that you’re sorry

    and you say that it hurts you the same

    is there something here to believe

    or is it just another part of the game?

     

    sora/kairi/riku where kairi cheats on sora.

    poor sora.

     

    018. blurry – puddle of mudd

     

    there’s oceans in between us

    but that’s not very far

     

    kaiora. sora’s trying to get back to kairi.

    zawwwwww.

     

    019. pieces – sum 41

     

    if you believe it’s in my soul

    I’d say all the words that I know

    Just to see if it would show

    That I’m trying to let you know

    That I’m better off on my own

     

    roxette or seifette break up.

     

    020. change your mind – all american rejects

     

     don’t run away, stop feeling fine

    it’s better than your worst, your worst day

    no words to say, I’ll give you mine

    and pocket all the hurt, and just stay

    don’t run away

     

    love/hate roxette. </3

     

    021. drops of jupiter – train

     

    can you imagine no love, pride, deep fried chicken

    your best friend always sticking up for you

    even when you know you’re wrong

    can you imagine no fist dance, freeze dried romance

    five hour conversation

    the best soy latte that you ever had…and me

     

    roxette. haha I think everything is either

    roxette or kaiora apparently. haha XD

     

    022. metamorphosis – hilary duff (wth?)

     

    things are different now, when I walk by

    you start to sweat and you don’t know why

    it gets me nervous but it makes me calm

    to see life all around me moving on

     

    squffie! yay!

     

    023. life is a highway – rascal flatts <33

     

    there was a distance between you and I

    (between you and I)

    a misunderstanding once

    but now we look it in the eye

     

    namiku or kairiku for sure <3

     

    024. I’m just a kid – simple plan

     

    what the hell is wrong with me?

    Don’t fit in with anybody

    How did this happen to me?

     

    roxas centric :-)

     

    025. a little less sixteen candles, a little more touch me – fall out boy

     

    I’m sleeping on your folk’s porch again dreaming

    She said, she said, she said “why don’t you just drop dead?”

     

    yuxas *gasp* or hayner&kairi.

     



    Current Mood: yay music!
    Current Music: simple and clean - utada hikaru
    Sunday, January 21st, 2007
    1:20 pm
    new cpu


    yay! i'm getting a new (old) computer put in my room!
    i'm so extremely happy! i can now keep all my writing
    private and even maybe a diary on MY computer.

    sweet deal.

    the only down side to this is that it won't have internet
    access, so i'll still be using the one i am currently using
    in the family room to do all my blogging and such.

    i finally finished one of the many challenges: torn pages
    for rosezephyr. it's a selphidus :-)

    upcoming: unspoken words for shelby <33

    [ loren ]

    Current Mood: new cpu!!!
    Current Music: the game of love - michelle branch
    Saturday, January 20th, 2007
    5:51 pm
    HOWDY YA'LL!!!
     

    haha XD homg i seriously went square dancing last
    night. no lie. i am dead serious. & you know what? it
    was loads of fun!

    last night kelsey came to sleep over & we were working
    on a fundraiser for our drama club, which happened to be
    a square dance. ( i have no idea who the heck came up with
    the idea of square-dancing... *ponders* )

    anyways, i put on my denim jacket and braided my hair
    and somehow managed to get my country accent back. it
    came pretty natural since i lived in the south for six years.

    it was loads of fun! i couldn't even believe it. there were so many...
    old people. but i still seemed to have the time of my life!

    ooOOo and even my old crush jesse danced with me. he's a 
    sweetheart. and really kyute ;-)

    ya'll come back now, ya her?
    [ loren ]

    Current Mood: yay squares!
    Current Music: simple & clean - utada hikaru
    Thursday, January 18th, 2007
    4:13 pm
     

    o_____o 
    ^ oh darn.

    i just realized that loren has a crap load of fics
    to write. yay, loren. 

    well okay...loren must work diligently then!
    haha XD

    oh the things that she'll write.

    » innocence « × sorette × for shelby
    » broken « × squffie × for shelby
    » holding on « × onesided kairiku × for shelby
    » unspoken words « × yura × for shelby
    » liar « × seifette × for shelby
    » compass « × jackelizabeth × for lunamaria
    » unbreakable « × soriku × for kelsey
    » torn pages « × selphidus × for rosezephyr
    » just friends « × yura × for carameru
    » high heels & ferris wheels « × haynerkairi × for lostnobody
    » white noise « × squffie × for airica adriene

    zomg o____o
    haha XD

    wish me luck!
    [ loren ]


    Current Mood: wowwy zowwy
    Current Music: from yesterday - thirty seconds to mars
    Wednesday, January 17th, 2007
    4:35 pm
    LAUREN WTH?
     

    i'm ticked. seriously. what the hell.
    i used to be a cheerleader, but i quit.
    however, i took a picture for the newspaper
    right before i quit & its in the one for
    today. 

    when i saw it i could have cried.

    they put my name as Lauren McDonald.
    WHAT THE HELL *beep beep beep!!!*
    my name is LOREN. & my last name doesn't
    even come close to that. it totally pissed me off.
    *searches for her spork* now i see why i quit the 
    team. everyone is an idiot.

    but besides that, everything else is ok. i got a 100
    on my art finals and my final grade in spanish is a 
    99.  i start my new classes friday, so i'm pretty psyched.

    ta ta for now,
    [ loren ]

    Current Mood: that is not my name *BEEPBEEP*
    Current Music: it's not over - daughtry
    Monday, January 15th, 2007
    3:09 pm
    10 Weird Habits Meme XD (tagged by binki)
     

    01. i have the habit of biting my lower lip when in deep thought.
    it's one of the awful reasons why they get so chapped in the winter. D:

    02. i am a HUGE procrastinator. i have the tendency of waiting to do
    all homework in homeroom or five minutes before the class starts. same
    goes for all my fics harhar XD.

    03. you tap a pencil in complete silence & you die. seriously. it drives me
    insane. i will stab you with my spork! >:0

    04. i hate it when my food touches on my plate. like, say i have mashed
    potatoes & steak on the same plate. they can not touch. ever. i am just
    odd like that  ;-)

    05. my mom actually uses this threat on me: 'loren, lightbulbs are a privelage'.
    i stay up so late with my lights on writing that she has to threaten to take my 
    lightbulbs away just so i go to bed.

    06. i like to correct people. especially my family. end of story.

    07. everything in my room can be a disasterous mess, but my writing notebooks
    are always stacked neatly in the corner of my room. i wuv them so so very much.
    there's....*counting*....43 notebooks so far. 

    08. i did something illegal once. i swam in a lake that so 'no swimming allowed',
    when i was in the second grade. i told the teacher i 'fell in' & she believed me. =p

    09. my favorite color became purple because i watched too much barney as a kid.

    10. i play on an all-guys lacrosse team. ( i am a girl if you didn't know XD) my dad 
    later on starting coaching us so i didn't get beat up too badly. i love it. it's the best
    sport ever!!!

    [ who wants to be tagged??? ] :-) you know you want to!

    [ loren ]

    Current Mood: im not sick anymore! nyah!!!
    Current Music: miss murder - afi
    8:12 am
    happiness :)
     

    my life is finally starting to look a lot better than
    what it was. you see, i had a great boyfriend for
    four months, up until the 4th of January. We broke
    up & i never told him it was because he was obsessive
    & envious & sometimes even downright scary.

    after that i got even more sick, so pretty much, my life has been
    crappy for a little bit.

    but...

    now, there's this guy named mike who's liked me for a while.
    he told me when i moved here, as i walked down the hall of
    the school he thought time stopped.

    yeah. XD

    we went out a couple of times, but nothing was really there. as the
    school year begun, i was happy to be just friends. but as it 
    progressed, well, there's always another side to things, isn't there.

    so i basically fell head over heels. last night, he asked me out at last.
    i thought straight back to my ex, but then i remembered what a jerk he
    was being to me. so im glad to say i said 'yes' without any regrets.

    [ loren ]

    Current Mood: i heart mike
    Current Music: if everyone cared - nickelback
    Sunday, January 14th, 2007
    7:40 am
    homg she's back!
     writing is everything to me.

    well. i've been off of livejournal for too long obviously. too much time on xanga ;-)
    but this is the place i shall rant about anything, everything, & nothing at all. i actually
    believe that if you comment i will love you forever. i heart comments!

    i hate being sick, & i've been sick for a long time now. a month really. pink eye in both
    eyes, an ear infection, & a god-awful cold. not good, especially when my mid-terms are
    this week. yay me. well, the only one i must worry about are my art finals. i don't have to
    take my spanish one because i have a grade above a ninty-seven. so heck yeah!

    i read caitlan's new fic on kairi & riku & i could have died & gone to heaven for all i know.
    i thought it was the best thing since fall out boy & sliced bread. good job, cait!

    other than that nothing remotely interesting has been going on for me. just trying to not
    be so ill. oooOOo & those who haven't entered, check out my xanga site to get into my 
    one hundred oneshot challenge! there are only a few left to pick from! well over fifty
    isn't really a few but hurry because they're going fast!

    [ love ]

    Current Mood: i'm starting to feel better!!!
    Current Music: kiss from a rose - seal
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